Cleaning part of of my room.

This has shifted from an attempt to gather, catalog, and do something about my books this evening. It has become something entirely more monstrous. I ostensibly cleaned this room out back in 2004. And yet, somehow I am finding object that not only shouldn't be in here, but that never belonged in this room and never belonged to me to begin with: relics of our move to this dump of a house back in 2001, during which I was incredibly sick and it fell to the rest of my family to pack my stuff and put what was thought to be mine in my room. But along with most of my stuff, a lot of other junk came for the ride. And some of it, nearly a decade later, is still here. I'm not even touching the closet for now. I'm already surrounded by junk. I'd take video of this with my laptop if I didn't think I would die of embarrassment.

The rest of this house is still worse, though. But forget that. No matter how awful the rest of this house is, I am going to do something about my room. Something. Not sure what. Can't possibly do it all tonight. And I do need to use the bed at some point, so I should probably figure out a way to remove the stuff that's there now. So, no video footage, but I will provide a written record of my sins. In this venture, I have discovered...

Table legs. Not just any table legs. These went to a table that has never existed in this house. Presumably the rest of the table was moved in a different box and didn't end up in my room. I think it was breccia or something covered in glass, so it was probably broken and thrown out shortly after we moved here. I think I actually knew that these damn things were still somewhere in my room, but I blocked it out because it was too stupid to consider. I am giving these to my parents because it seems good for a laugh and there's a decent chance that my dad won't actually throw them away and that they will survive to end up in some museum centuries from now along with the rest of the crap unearthed from our house, preserved only by virtue of the building's ridiculously bunker-like design while the rest of the neighborhood perished in some natural disaster or something.

A pocket calculator still in its box. Might be nice if it were something actually useful, instead of stupid and obsolete.

Mix CD's that Eric made and later gave to me. They were sitting on a book. They should still play. Not that I ever bother to put a CD into the drive on either of my computers. But it's a nice idea. I'm saving these, of course.

A pad of sticky-notes from GRCC. Probably from when I first started there back in 2005. Why would I keep these? I never use sticky notes. These go in the trash.

A blue slip of paper with text in blue Sharpie reading, "I got you the BEST bookmark ever! Love you. V" Are you kidding? I'm totally keeping this. If it was in a book at the library and I pulled it out and brought it home, then it is clearly worthy of my collection.

Audio cassette tapes featuring Ravi Zacharias and Zig Ziglar: two people whose opinions I couldn't care less about. Just about all of my dad's other tapes were destroyed by being in our garage. Most of my family's possessions were in carboard boxes there for storage. When my mother tried to move some, she found that even though the boxes looked normal, when she tried to lift them, the tops and sides of the boxes would pull away, revealing that whatever was in them was completely ruined. Our garage didn't flood or anything. It's just so humid and mold-infested that nothing left in there is safe.

One of those flashing light clip-on things that doesn't even work, possibly because it has the word "Boeing" on it, meaning that it's from when my dad worked for Boeing.

A nerf dart gun. Awesome.

I think these are 3-D glasses. Whatever. I don't need them.

Underwear. Um, I have no idea how these got here?

A dozen plastic grocery bags. I laugh at the oceans. Or is it cry?

My checks. These should last me for the next 50 years or so at this rate.

Drugs. And the "discard by" date hasn't even been reached yet.

The adapter for my mouse that I bought. I forget what this adapter is called, but I don't need it. Might as well keep it somewhere in case I do? I don't know. I don't want to be a packrat, but this is potentially useful. I might be able to use it to connect the mouse to my old computer or something. I think my old computer is too old even for that...

The test of a sea urchin, specifically a "sand dollar." I've probably had this for like, a really long time. Might as well keep it.

My flash cards for reactions in organic chemistry. Excellent.

A handheld game called "Radar Sea Combat" that still works. Amusing. How old is this thing?

Magic CD's of the old Microprose variety. I never bought these, but I think I salvaged them from our garage and my brother must have gotten them somehow. I should try to install this stuff on my old computer, although I already got some of that software from the Home of the Underdogs back when they had it.

This amazing thing that I stole from my dad. No way am I giving this back to him. It's a miniature poster thing of the electromagnetic spectrum and presents it better than just about anywhere else I've seen. Really cool. I say I stole it from him but in reality he let me borrow it and I've just never given it back. That being said, one of the reasons for me not giving it back was that it was hidden behind a wall of books on my "bookshelf." And no, I didn't forget that it was there. I just didn't want to give it back to my dad. I will treasure it forever. Uh, I mean I will give it back to my dad at some point.

A beaten up page of sleeves for cards. Useless.

A laminated map of the good old U.S.A. One of those ones where Alaska is in a box with a different scale from the rest of the map so that it looks smaller. The state of Texas undoubtedly cut this company a check.

A 2005 calender that I am guessing my mother gave me because it's a Pink Floyd calender. No need for old calenders.

A GRCC schedule for last quarter. I'm sure I have much older ones around here somewhere, though. Throwing this one out.

Award certificate things from high school, mostly from wrestling. Amazing how hard my name is to spell. No, it's not "Steven." And it's not "Stephan" either. I am Stephen Bahl. Is that so confusing? I also see my promotion certificate to green belt in judo that I thought I looked everywhere for back when I was supposed to make a copy of it for my next promotion. Whatever.

A tumbler from Jet City Pizza. I think the phone number changed, so the one on it is no good. I hope that place is still around, actually. They might not be. Does anyone know? Wait, this is the internet. I can just look it up. Looks like it isn't. That's a shame.

Another map, but this one is my "First State Quarters of the United States Collector's Map." And I did complete it. This thing is worth big money. Like we're talking $12.50 at least.

Some sort of Leatherman knockoff thing that I've had for like 15 years. Maybe more. Be prepared.

Okay. I think that's everything but the books, which is sort of like saying that's a small fraction of the mess I'm dealing with, since the vast majority actually is books. But this is already running on and I haven't even started on the books. I'll report back on that issue later.